Trade Mission From Boston Visiting Serbia Today

Kind of fun to read this press release about mainly Boston-based companies whose executives are touring Serbia today as part of a trade mission. Seems like they are mostly seeking cheap tech labor; although, based on his name alone, I bet US executive Milenko Beslic will be busy also visiting relatives!

I've emailed him personally to ask how the mission goes and will let you know if I hear back.

Super-Easy Way to Piss Off Serbs: Praise Any Clinton

In a move calculated to piss off pretty much every Serb around the world, Kosovo is about to unveil a statue of Bill Clinton. This is an overly dramatic comparison, but think how would Americans feel if another country commissioned a big public statue of Osama bin Laden?

Deliberate provocation.

I wasn't aware of any connection between Clinton and Serbia before I married my husband, and so was astonished by Serbs' invariably venomous reaction to any mention of the name "Clinton." The anger extends to the whole Clinton family, and simmers just under boiling to this day. It's about the NATO bombing of course. Something typical Americans were only vaguely aware of, and only few knew Clinton had anything to do with. It was a European thing, between Europeans, surely?, many would say if asked.

So no one in New York thought it was unusual when then-Senator Hilary Clinton promised to use her powers of international persuasion to get that young Serbian basketball player sent back to the US to stand trial for beating up an American in a bar a couple of years ago. Anyone who knew Serbs laughed at her presumption. Not a chance. No matter how hard she tried or what she promised -- with a name like Clinton!

And now, most people in the US who hear about the new statue of Bill Clinton in Kosovo will probably think, 'How nice' and assume American aid such as food for hungry people or help building schools had something to do with this international 'thank you'. They won't recognize the insult. Kosovo is slapping Serbia in the face, and using an American President's image to do it.

Serbian Man vs American Woman: The Toilet-Seat Battle Rages On...

I'm not naming names, but, somebody-just-back-from-the-Balkans apparently unlearned his ability to put the toilet seat back down after using it. Five years of my seat-tutorials down the toilet after just three short weeks visiting the old country. What is it with Central European men? Do women there never teach them anything?

Freakishly Strange 'We'll Wrap Your Baggage in Plastic" Service At Belgrade Airport

The first time I saw this in the central hall at Nikola Tesla Airport, I stopped in my tracks. I've traveled quite a bit. Across the USA, Italy, UK, India, Nepal, and various way-stations in between. I had never, ever seen a machine that wrapped your luggage in plastic before.

I'm particularly thrilled by this photo -- which required multiple visits to the Belgrade Serbia Airport -- because it shows the machine in action. I'd seen the machine sitting there with its attendant many times before, but somehow never quite believed that anyone actually used it. This is proof that people do!

My assumption, which could be utterly wrong, is that some Serbs headed abroad, this machine makes perfect sense. Perhaps this is their first time. Perhaps they want to put their best foot forward. Perhaps they think if their luggage is scuffed, it would look old and tacky. Perhaps they have no idea that we travelers in the West consider scuffs a badge of honor, showing that you've been there, done that, and sold the t-shirt at a garage sale already.

Visiting the Balkans (a View from the One Left at Home)

So I'm going crazy because my husband has been over in the Balkans, mainly Serbia and Croatia, for the past three weeks. We had personal business why he had to leave. These days US banks are giving 1.85% interest on CDs, Serbian and Croatian banks are giving 3.5-6% interest on CDs, so he decided to move his savings.

But I think part of the unofficial reason he took off is because I got bored-shitless in "early retirement" so I launched another start-up and am working crazy hours again.... for just now I swear! But, Balkan men like to come home from work at noon and find a meal waiting for them along with a smiling relaxed woman who might not be averse to a midday nap. And I was like, "I hope you don't mind left-overs; how fast can I get back to my computer?"

Well that's an over-exaggeration on both sides, but you get the idea.

So anyway, he jetted off to deal with Balkan financials while I worked longer hours on my start-up which will payoff someday in the future.

The plan backfired when I ran up against the no-husband-here wall though. It's a psychological thing. For the first week he's gone, I'm more than ok. In fact I'm actively thrilled. I'm Getting Work Done Without Interruptions! I feel like a balsa-wood model airplane set loose to fly on my own in a hot updraft. Then week two comes. Cooler air. My work starts to stumble. By week three, the winds are positively frigid. I'm losing altitude quickly.

Even now, he's in a good mood on the cell phone when I call each morning. Things are going well. He's met with this old friend and that old buddy. He's moved the money. He's dealt with the landbooks (In Croatia, 2009 is the last year to register former family lands officially so they're not taken over by the State.)

He misses me. Sure. Of course. But this and that happened yesterday and isn't it all exciting? Such is traveling.

But I'm back in my office in the US. I haven't been able to sleep at all for the past week. Just a couple of hours a night. I'm so tired now the extra hours aren't translating into more work done. It's all an ashy, tired eyes, burned out gray. Ten hours at the computer equals maybe three if I were really awake.

I can't sleep. I can't sleep without him. Damn the Balkans.