Experiences of an American woman who was married to a Serb.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Mister, You Ain't No Serb

So, I'm driving back from lunch in Abiquiu New Mexico today, and the other drivers are making me CRAZY. It's a rural hilly area, but the roads are US western-style wide, as straight as possible, and exceptionally well-kept. This means everyone wants to drive far faster than the posted speed limit of 55-60 MPH. Well, ok. Fine. Go for the gusto.

But I won't. Because I'm in this horrible whale of a rental. It seats 8 (in Serbia that would be 12, in Nepal it would be more like 20.) The rental place told me it was this or a Hummer, and I'd rather look like a soccer mom than an asshole. In an effort to conserve gas, juggle my camera while driving in beautiful Georgia O'Keefe country, and not roll over on moderately sharp curves, I'm going precisely the speed limit.

Which means there's this long line of locals driving behind me who are clearly going Nuts Stuck Behind the Soccer Mom Tourist. Occasionally I do the good girl thing and pull over to the side of the road to let everyone blast past me. But, you know, after awhile it just gets tiresome.

Why won't anybody pass me?! They'll ride up to my back bumper and stare at me real hard so my neck gets itchy, but by god, nobody will pass even when given acres of perfectly legal opportunity.

That's when I realize I've been married to a Serb for too long. Only a Serb would think a microsecond of space with oncoming traffic an eyelash away is plenty of room for passing one, two, maybe even three cars. Serbs pass like bats out of hell. Serbs are the gods of passing. But then a lot more of them die in traffic accidents than Americans do.

Well, hey.


Ron said...

Hi Sweetie!

Your writing blows me away! I feel like I was there watching it all happen and can hear your voice in my head when I read your posts - how scary is that??

{big hug}

Mario said...

Just spent a week with my Serbian friends in Tunisia driving a lot. My friend was blindly overtaking truck in the dark night on right curve and he concluded: We could have been killed both! And he got 3 kids recently at age 50+.

I enjoy your discoveries of crazy Balkan. Best book about English people was writen by Hungarian :-)

Best regards from Ljubljana, EU